Is it lonely to travel alone? Tips from a single travelers of 9 years

For some people, the biggest obstacle to traveling alone is whether they will feel lonely. If you’re worried about this, you’re not alone. This is the most common problem I encounter when traveling alone, and my biggest fear when deciding whether or not to travel alone.

I was scared. It was the last thing I wanted to do. I worried that I would feel lonely all the time. At the time, I was an extreme extrovert who got energy from interacting with other people.

I’m happy to report that I met some people right away, and it was a piece of cake. I still do this when traveling alone, and it’s become one of my favorite things about traveling alone!

But I know some people who don’t have that experience, and it’s because they’re not ready for solo travel success, so here are all my best tips to help you have the most social and enriching travel experience possible:

9. Pick Social Accommodation

The easiest way to ensure you meet people while traveling is to choose social accommodation. That’s why my first year of traveling in Southeast Asia, despite budget constraints, stayed in hotels and dormitories. I was shocked at how easy it was to meet people. Not only were there lots of other solo travelers, but they were all friendly and outgoing, and I rarely had time alone – I loved it!

If you’re in your 30s or older, I know you might think that hotels are for young people, not for you. In some parts of the world, you’re right. However, I found that in South America, Southern Africa and China, people of all ages are staying in hotels. If you want some alone time and your own space, you can also choose a private room at the hotel.

I have an entire article devoted to navigating an over-30 hotel, read more here.

8. Choose Destinations with a Common Sport or Draw

Places where people go for a common reason, such as kitesurfing, diving, hiking, mountaineering or surfing, also tend to attract other solo travelers.

Maybe the Maldives or Cancun aren’t your best bet, but Toefl in Mozambique (surfing and diving), Lele in Thailand (rock climbing), Patagonia (hiking) or Ubud in Bali (yoga and healthy living) are all places you like that appeal to solo travelers. These are just a few of the many examples from around the world.

Is there an activity you like or have always wanted to try? Center your trip around this and you’re sure to meet other people who are doing the same thing.

7. Take Group Trips

There is no shame in starting your solo trip with a group tour. Even if you don’t consider yourself the group travel type, there may be something for you, such as a mountain backpacking trip or scuba diving boathouse. These are some of my favorites when I was abroad and I met the coolest people of all ages.

This was a big reason I started leading my own female adventures as a tour guide. Some of my guests have told me it was the first time they had been in such a supportive environment with other women, and many have made lifelong friends since then.

You never know who you might meet, and this might be a good way to give it a go.

6. Take Day Trips

If you’re not keen on signing up for a group trip, consider taking a day trip. There are many options available through sites such as meetup.com, local Facebook groups, and perhaps some options or suggestions for your accommodation.

Hiking, snorkeling, food Tours, and hiking expeditions are all great ways to meet new people. It was something I relied on for much of my solo return to Southeast Asia in my 30s, when I was no longer interested in staying in hotels. Many years later I met up with my best friend in snorkeling (especially in Siagao) in Berlin!

5. Join Retreats

More and more single women are traveling the world in search of connection and rejuvenation
Now that I no longer live in hotels, I enjoy going to retreats and meeting like-minded people. Sure, they can be a little pricey, but if you choose your retreat wisely, you’ll want to unwind from it, rejuvenate, and build lifelong friendships.

I did silent meditation retreats in Thailand (don’t worry, you can chat afterwards!). , spiritual retreats in Bali, Mexico, Egypt and Ibiza, also seen in Indonesia mixed yoga retreats/hotels (especially in Lombok and Bali).

Here is a list of some good places to find women’s retreats or meditation retreats, if that’s more for you.

4. Resist the Urge to Hide in Your Room

For introverts, getting into social situations can be difficult, especially alone. But you have to! If the accommodation you choose to stay in has a common area, hang out there! Travelers are friendly, and you’re unlikely to be the only solo traveler around. Also, you’re in a place where no one knows you, so there’s nothing to worry about in terms of judgment or embarrassment.

I’m definitely one of those people who gets isolated even though they want to connect. I used to be super outgoing, but I guess I’ve grown up. That’s why I like to book a day trip for myself, because I’ve already paid for it and I can’t get out.

Sometimes I enjoy my solitude too, but it’s all about balance.

3. Put Your Phone Down

Whether it’s in the common area of a social accommodation or hanging out at a social cafe, trust me when I say you’re unapproachable if you’re staring at your phone. I’ve met the most amazing people in cafes in Southeast Asia and beyond, but it’s always because I’m willing to put down my phone, make eye contact and smile at people.

I know it’s hard, because for many of us, looking at our phones is how we cope when we’re alone in restaurants or social Settings. But that’s exactly why you should let it go. The phone is not someone you can hang out with, and it may actually feed your feelings of loneliness and isolation.

This is your chance to have a conversation with anyone nearby, and it can be as simple as asking them where they’re from. Trust me, try it!

2. Find Fellow Solo Travelers Online

These days, there are some options to find other individual travelers to meet online first. I know a lot of people who use Tinder to find Platonic friends abroad, and I’ve also heard that dating apps now have Friend versions, like Bumble Friend, though I think it’s for long-term friendships.

That’s why I started the BMTM Solo Female Traveler Connect Facebook group. This is a special group for people who identify women to network, meet, discuss travel plans and get advice.

I’ve also used Couchsurfing, joined groups of my friends to meet friends of friends, and even met other bloggers abroad on Twitter.

It’s best to hold these meetings in a public place until you really get to know the person, but I’m happy to report that I’ve made some lifelong friendships by starting online first!

1. Be Willing to Make the First Move

Sometimes, I just need to be the extrovert and start the conversation. At first, it was uncomfortable for me, but the more I reached out to travelers and started conversations, the more I built up my confidence. Travelers are usually friendly, sociable people. Be it a cafe, bar, social accommodation or a public area on a tour, be willing to be the person to say hello or start a conversation.

It can empower, and if it doesn’t work or you and the person don’t click, it doesn’t matter, you can try again with someone else. Remember, you’re in a place where no one knows you and anything can happen. All you have to do is open your mind to the possibilities.